Wonderful Writing

Room 5 have been learning how to 'show' not 'tell' the reader by writing words and language features that create an image in our heads, tino pai.  Also this week, we have learnt how to start each paragraph with a topic sentence that will show the reader what the paragraph will be about.
Here are 2 pieces of our wonderful writing -

Holidays!

I flung myself into the diesel-powered cheater.  I revved up the massive motor and left my stomach behind.  It felt like I was shooting out of a cannon.

I threw myself around the corner and saw nothing but black.  I heard the sound of miniature cars zooming past, I smelt gassy air, I felt cold water on my face.  I opened my eyes and saw flashing lights…

By Thomas Bain

Embarrassing!

My supermarket accident was really embarrassing.

Firstly, mum asked me to get the milk at the end of the shop.  Next, I popped the milk in the trolley and gave mum a huge kiss.  Finally, I realised I kissed the wrong lady!

I felt as if there was boiling water pouring down my head.  My cheeks turned as red as roses.  I grabbed back the milk and ran back to my real mum.  Every time I go to the supermarket I can’t help thinking about it.

By Jacqui Forman